| I don't know what my friend saw in this movie. Really. My three companions and I all had the same perception of the movie, despite one Avengers fan, three Avengers virgins, and one dozing reviewer. It sucked. It was incoherent, slow paced, and it didn't even delivery style in spades - it was devoid of pleasure except for seeing Ralph Fiennes naked, sort of. Uma didn't inhabit her body half the time, and nothing seemed to happen, and then somehow the good guys won, and it was over. Sean Connery turned in a shameful performance as the bad guy. |
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I walked into the theatre never having seen (or heard of, prior to the movie's announcement) the Avengers TV show, but sometimes that's a good thing. I was assured afterward that it was just like the 1968 series, in that it was slow, veddy veddy British, and weird and random. However, the reason shows like that aren't made any more is because they are boring. Fine. I hoped for some slick costumes, some witty repartee if I was lucky, and some cool visuals, like the ones hinted at in the preview. "I'll bet the scene where they are walking in those big clear balls will be cool - what bad asses they must be!" No such luck! Have you ever watched a movie and dozed off and then awoken just to feel like you missed something * really * important? I felt like that long before the painful old BBC pacing drove me to slumber - and the three people watching with me said they felt the same way - BUT THEY NEVER FELL ASLEEP. |
| I realized about 30 minutes in that I had glazed over, as if I were at a staff meeting (er, at another company of course). The stimulus being processed by my brain was so devoid of content or interest, that it was more diverting to see how far I could reduce my heart and respiration rate without actually dying than to watch the movie.
Oh, I am so angry I paid fill price! Don't make the same mistake I did! I can save you the trouble and pain and bitterness. Listen to me. Don't go see it! The lone Avenger viewer also assured me that there should be no hookup between Mrs. Peel and Mr. Steed. I didn't care about them before entering the theatre nor did I care when the inevitable hookup occurred. |
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| Ecch. Fellow detractor Ben Combee says : "This film will be a cult classic. Not all cults are good. Neither is this film." |
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